Are you about to break, but you know that you can't give up, because you're little one needs you?
Do you find yourself snapping at your partner, because you’re exhausted all the time?
Do you feel touched out from breastfeeding constantly, but your little one is upset and needs more cuddles? (And, of course, only accepts them from you, because boobs...)
Motherhood can be hard and lonely.
Motherhood makes you happy and pushes you to the brink all at the same time, doesn't it?
You might feel like you’ve lost control over your life and the person who's in charge now is not even half your size yet.
As a life coach, I support mamas to find ways to help them overcome exhaustion and sleep deprivation. I believe this work is so important because, let’s be honest, when you feel worn out every day you can’t be the mama that you want to be for your little one.
Our children need our love and attention, but when we’re near breaking point, that's not what they get
I'm not saying this to make you feel guilty. (I really don't, because I've been there myself when I was a new mama.)
I say this, because I want to help you break out of the cycle of exhaustion and losing your patience with the people you love.
Of course, we all have "off days" every now and again, but one thing I know for sure from coaching other mamas, as well as from my own experience, is that the more you ignore your own needs, the more resentful you’ll feel and the more you let it out on the people around you. (Let alone the way you talk to yourself when you "mess up” and aren't the perfect mama, wife, daughter, friend etc.)
Let’s break out of this cycle
Now, first things first, I can't make your little one sleep through the night. (You have no idea how much I wish I would have a magic wand that could make this miracle happen...)
Sleep is a developmental milestone just like learning to walk and, therefore, our little ones will reach it when THEY are ready and not when we want them to.
Of course, you can try white noise, using lavender oil when you bath your little one at night or any of the other tips and tricks you can read about online. But be prepared that those things might not actually do anything to improve your little one’s sleep. (However, using lavender oil might help YOU to stay more relaxed when your child takes over an hour again to fall asleep. 😉)
Most of the time the one thing that our little sleep thieves need is... *insert drumroll here* … TIME!
They need time to hit this developmental milestone of sleeping through the night without any pressure or sleep training.
(Side note: Some children have underlying medical issues that can be the reason for their wakefulness. If you have reason to believe that could be the case for your little one, please get medical advice.)
Here’s what you can do when your little one doesn’t sleep through the night
A tip I wish someone would've shared with me when my daughter was still a baby is:
STOP FOCUSING SO MUCH ON SLEEP (or better the lack of it)!
Especially when sleep is hard to come by, mama, I really want you to stop counting nightly wake ups and calculating how many hours of sleep you got (or didn't get). Believe me, it only makes you feel worse and ultimately doesn't change the fact that you're not getting as much sleep as you'd like right now. Go to bed as early as possible and get as much sleep as you can, but don’t ponder over how many hours you actually got and how often your little one woke up.
Also, sleep isn't the only way to improve your wellbeing. There are other ways to deal with the effects of sleep deprivation, but I know that when we’re so tired it’s hard to think straight and the only solution that we seem to come up with is a good night’s sleep. When that’s not an option, we end up feeling even more exhausted and hopeless. Please don’t give up though, mama!
Yes, getting a decent amount of sleep is important, but there are so many other ways to take better care of yourself. There are many simple yet powerful things you can do everyday to improve how you feel – even when you’re not getting a full night’s sleep.
Grab my new free resource to get a list of all the small things you do for yourself daily
In MEET YOUR NEEDS – The powerful self-care checklist for mamas I give you all the tools to improve your overall wellbeing even when you're little one is far from sleeping through the night. This simple yet powerful self-care checklist will serve you both as a cheat sheet and a reminder to do lots of little things for yourself regularly to fill up your cup.
Head to my website and sign up for my bi-weekly newsletter to receive MEET YOUR NEEDS – The powerful self-care checklist for mamas.
Using this free resource will help you to break the cycle of exhaustion and loosing patience with the people you love the most. It’ll enable you to show the people close to you some love (including yourself, mama)!!
Don't wait until you had the next go at your partner or until you're so desperate that you secretly think of running away. When you grab MEET YOUR NEEDS – The powerful self-care checklist for mamas now, you can start making impactful changes to your wellbeing today.
Much love,
